Making a Great First Impression!
It takes just a quick glance, maybe three seconds, for someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first time. In this short time, the other person forms an opinion about you based on your appearance, your body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms, and how you are dressed.
With every new encounter, you are evaluated and yet another person’s impression of you is formed. These first impression can be nearly impossible to reverse or undo, making those first encounters extremely important, for they set the tone for the all the relationships that follows.
So, whether they are in your career or social life, it’s important to know how to create a good first impression. This article provides some useful tips to help you do this.
Be on Time
The person you are meeting for the first time is not interested in your “good excuse” for running late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. And allow flexibility for possible delays in traffic or taking a wrong turn. Arriving early is much better that arriving late, hands down, and is the first step in creating a great first impression.
Be Yourself, Be at Ease
If you are feeling uncomfortable and on edge, this can make the other person ill at ease and that’s a sure way to create the wrong impression. If you are calm and confident, so the other person will feel more at ease, and so have a solid foundation for making that first impression a good one. See our section on relaxation techniques to find out how to calm that adrenaline!
Present Yourself Appropriately
Of course physical appearance matters. The person you are meeting for the first time does not know you and your appearance is usually the first clue he or she has to go on.
But it certainly does not mean you need to look like a model to create a strong and positive first impression. (Unless you are interviewing with your local model agency, of course!)
No. The key to a good impression is to present yourself appropriately.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and so the “picture” you first present says much about you to the person you are meeting. Is your appearance saying the right things to help create the right first impression?
Start with the way you dress. What is the appropriate dress for the meeting or occasion? In a business setting, what is the appropriate business attire? Suit, blazer, casual? And ask yourself what the person you'll be meeting is likely to wear - if your contact is in advertising or the music industry, a pinstripe business suit may not strike the right note!
For business and social meetings, appropriate dress also varies between countries and cultures, so it’s something that you should pay particular attention to when in an unfamiliar setting or country. Make sure you know the traditions and norms.
And what about your personal grooming? Clean and tidy appearance is appropriate for most business and social occasions. A good haircut or shave. Clean and tidy clothes. Neat and tidy make up. Make sure your grooming is appropriate and helps make you feel “the part”.
Appropriate dressing and grooming help make a good first impression and also help you feel “the part”, and so feel more calm and confident. Add all of this up and you are well on your way to creating a good first impression.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Things to do everyday
Follow these ten golden rules and enjoy every moment of living.
~ Greet your family members first thing in the morning. If you are not used to this, they will be surprised with your sudden and nice gesture.
~ Greet your peers, subordinates and boss once you enter the office. Smile at even the 'security' personnel standing at the gate, who takes care of your safety.
~ Greet your friends along the way and do not ignore them.
~ Continously reciprocate to breed communication. If you do not reciprocate at least with a 'thanks' when you get information or a source on your online network or your offline network, you will not be remembered for a long time. If you are not remembered, you are out of your network.
~ Be a proactive listener and empathise with others to command respect.
~ While talking to others, your voice, tone and tenor must be audible and soothing. It should not be aggressive or in a shouting mode.
~ Dress well to suit your profession and to create positive vibes in your workplace. If you are a sales representative, do not go out with printed shirts and jeans, which may turn down your customer.
~ Political and religious comments must be avoided at all costs in the workplace, when you are in a group.
~ Your communication should not provoke others.
~ Do not speak ill of others if you can help it.
Follow these ten golden rules and enjoy every moment of living.
~ Greet your family members first thing in the morning. If you are not used to this, they will be surprised with your sudden and nice gesture.
~ Greet your peers, subordinates and boss once you enter the office. Smile at even the 'security' personnel standing at the gate, who takes care of your safety.
~ Greet your friends along the way and do not ignore them.
~ Continously reciprocate to breed communication. If you do not reciprocate at least with a 'thanks' when you get information or a source on your online network or your offline network, you will not be remembered for a long time. If you are not remembered, you are out of your network.
~ Be a proactive listener and empathise with others to command respect.
~ While talking to others, your voice, tone and tenor must be audible and soothing. It should not be aggressive or in a shouting mode.
~ Dress well to suit your profession and to create positive vibes in your workplace. If you are a sales representative, do not go out with printed shirts and jeans, which may turn down your customer.
~ Political and religious comments must be avoided at all costs in the workplace, when you are in a group.
~ Your communication should not provoke others.
~ Do not speak ill of others if you can help it.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
"The proper function of man is to live - not to exist."
"The proper function of man is to live - not to exist." -- Jack London
Too often we go through life on autopilot, going through the motions and having each day pass like the one before it.That's fine, and comfortable, until you have gone through another year without having done anything, without having really lived life.
That's fine, until you have reached old age and look back on life with regrets.That's fine, until you see your kids go off to college and realize that you missed their childhoods.It's not fine. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold and drink from life.
What follows is just a list of ideas, obvious ones mostly that you could have thought of yourself, but that I hope are useful reminders. We all need reminders sometimes. If you find this useful, print it out, and start using it. Today.
1. Love. Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone -- it doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time.
2. Get outside. Don't let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it's raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.
3. Savor food. Don't just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.
4. Create a morning ritual. Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.
5. Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Quit your job and go to business for yourself (plan it out first!), or go up to that girl you've liked for a long time and ask her out. What do you have to lose?
6. Follow excitement. Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure after another (with perhaps some quiet times in between).
7. Find your passion. Similar to the above tip, this one asks you to find your calling. Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once.
8. Get out of your cubicle. Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don't waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It's worth it.
9. Turn off the TV. How many hours will we waste away in front of the boob tube? How many hours do we have to live? Do the math, then unplug the TV. Only plug it back in when you have a DVD of a movie you love. Otherwise, keep it off and find other stuff to do. Don't know what to do? Read further.
10. Pull away from Internet. You're reading something on the Internet right now. And, with the exception of this article, it is just more wasting away of your precious time. You cannot get these minutes back. Unplug the Internet, then get out of your office or house. Right now! And go and do something.
11. Travel. Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you're older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don't check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world.
12. Rediscover what's important. Take an hour and make a list of everything that's important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.
13. Eliminate everything else. What's going on in your life that's not on that short list? All that stuff is wasting your time, pulling your attention from what's important. As much as possible, simplify your life by eliminating the stuff that's not on your short list, or minimizing it.
14. Exercise. Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some push ups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you'll love it. And life will be more alive.
15. Be positive. Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can't do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this!
16. Open your heart. Is your heart a closed bundle of scar tissue? Learn to open it, have it ready to receive love, to give love unconditionally. If you have a problem with this, talk to someone about it. And practice makes perfect.
17. Kiss in the rain. Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home? Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send her a love note. Dress sexy for him.
18. Face your fears. What are you most afraid of? What is holding you back? Whatever it is, recognize it, and face it. Do what you are most afraid of. Afraid of heights? Go to the tallest building, and look down over the edge. Only by facing our fears can we be free of them.
19. When you suffer, suffer. Life isn't all about fun and games. Suffering is an inevitable part of life. We lose our jobs. We lose our lovers. We lose our pets. We get physically injured or sick. A loved one becomes sick. A parent dies. Learn to feel the pain intensely, and really grieve. This is a part of life -- really feel the pain. And when you're done, move on, and find joy.
20. Slow down. Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It's not healthy, and it's not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly -- everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do. Learn to move at a snail's pace.
21. Touch humanity. Get out of your house and manicured neighborhoods, and find those who live in worse conditions. Meet them, talk to them, understand them. Live among them. Be one of them. Give up your materialistic lifestyle.
22. Volunteer. Help at homeless soup kitchens. Learn compassion, and learn to help ease the suffering of others. Help the sick, those with disabilities, those who are dying.
23. Play with children. Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.
24. Talk to old people. There is no one wiser, more experienced, more learned, than those who have lived through life. They can tell you amazing stories. Give you advice on making a marriage last or staying out of debt. Tell you about their regrets, so you can learn from them and avoid the same mistakes. They are the wisdom of our society -- take advantage of their existence while they're still around.
25. Learn new skills. Constantly improve yourself instead of standing still -- not because you're so imperfect now, but because it is gratifying and satisfying. You should accept yourself as you are, and learn to love who you are, but still try to improve -- if only because the process of improvement is life itself.
26. Find spirituality. For some, this means finding God or Jesus or Allah or Buddha. For others, this means becoming in tune with the spirits of our ancestors, or with nature. For still others, this just means an inner energy. Whatever spirituality means for you, rediscover it, and its power.
27. Take mini-retirements. Don't leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you're young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up, sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.
28. Do nothing. Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.
29. Stop playing video games. They might be fun, but they can take up way too much time. If you spend a lot of time playing online games, or computer solitaire, or Wii or Gameboy or whatever, consider going a week without it. Then find something else to do, outside.
30. Watch sunsets, daily. One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so.
31. Stop reading magazines. They're basically crap. And they waste your time and money. Cancel your subscriptions and walk past them at the news stands. If you have to read something, read a trashy novel or even better, read Dumb Little Man once a day and be done.
32. Break out from ruts. Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.
33. Stop watching the news. It's depressing and useless. If you're a news junky, this may be difficult. I haven't watch TV news or read a newspaper regularly in about two years. It hasn't hurt me a bit. Anything important, my mom tells me about.
34. Laugh till you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.
35. Lose control. Not only control over yourself, but control over others. It's a bad habit to try to control others -- it will only lead to stress and unhappiness for yourself and those you try to control. Let others live, and live for yourself. And lose control of yourself now and then too.
36. Cry. Men, especially, tend to hold in our tears, but crying is an amazing release. Cry at sad movies. Cry at a funeral. Cry when you are hurt, or when somebody you love is hurt. It releases these emotions and allows us to cleanse ourselves.
37. Make an awesome dessert. I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn't an every day thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it's wonderful.
38. Try something new, every week. Ask yourself: "What new thing shall I try this week?" Then be sure to do it. You don't have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life.
39. Be in the moment. Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.
- Leo Babauta
Too often we go through life on autopilot, going through the motions and having each day pass like the one before it.That's fine, and comfortable, until you have gone through another year without having done anything, without having really lived life.
That's fine, until you have reached old age and look back on life with regrets.That's fine, until you see your kids go off to college and realize that you missed their childhoods.It's not fine. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold and drink from life.
What follows is just a list of ideas, obvious ones mostly that you could have thought of yourself, but that I hope are useful reminders. We all need reminders sometimes. If you find this useful, print it out, and start using it. Today.
1. Love. Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone -- it doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time.
2. Get outside. Don't let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it's raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.
3. Savor food. Don't just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.
4. Create a morning ritual. Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.
5. Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Quit your job and go to business for yourself (plan it out first!), or go up to that girl you've liked for a long time and ask her out. What do you have to lose?
6. Follow excitement. Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure after another (with perhaps some quiet times in between).
7. Find your passion. Similar to the above tip, this one asks you to find your calling. Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once.
8. Get out of your cubicle. Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don't waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It's worth it.
9. Turn off the TV. How many hours will we waste away in front of the boob tube? How many hours do we have to live? Do the math, then unplug the TV. Only plug it back in when you have a DVD of a movie you love. Otherwise, keep it off and find other stuff to do. Don't know what to do? Read further.
10. Pull away from Internet. You're reading something on the Internet right now. And, with the exception of this article, it is just more wasting away of your precious time. You cannot get these minutes back. Unplug the Internet, then get out of your office or house. Right now! And go and do something.
11. Travel. Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you're older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don't check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world.
12. Rediscover what's important. Take an hour and make a list of everything that's important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.
13. Eliminate everything else. What's going on in your life that's not on that short list? All that stuff is wasting your time, pulling your attention from what's important. As much as possible, simplify your life by eliminating the stuff that's not on your short list, or minimizing it.
14. Exercise. Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some push ups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you'll love it. And life will be more alive.
15. Be positive. Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can't do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this!
16. Open your heart. Is your heart a closed bundle of scar tissue? Learn to open it, have it ready to receive love, to give love unconditionally. If you have a problem with this, talk to someone about it. And practice makes perfect.
17. Kiss in the rain. Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home? Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send her a love note. Dress sexy for him.
18. Face your fears. What are you most afraid of? What is holding you back? Whatever it is, recognize it, and face it. Do what you are most afraid of. Afraid of heights? Go to the tallest building, and look down over the edge. Only by facing our fears can we be free of them.
19. When you suffer, suffer. Life isn't all about fun and games. Suffering is an inevitable part of life. We lose our jobs. We lose our lovers. We lose our pets. We get physically injured or sick. A loved one becomes sick. A parent dies. Learn to feel the pain intensely, and really grieve. This is a part of life -- really feel the pain. And when you're done, move on, and find joy.
20. Slow down. Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It's not healthy, and it's not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly -- everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do. Learn to move at a snail's pace.
21. Touch humanity. Get out of your house and manicured neighborhoods, and find those who live in worse conditions. Meet them, talk to them, understand them. Live among them. Be one of them. Give up your materialistic lifestyle.
22. Volunteer. Help at homeless soup kitchens. Learn compassion, and learn to help ease the suffering of others. Help the sick, those with disabilities, those who are dying.
23. Play with children. Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.
24. Talk to old people. There is no one wiser, more experienced, more learned, than those who have lived through life. They can tell you amazing stories. Give you advice on making a marriage last or staying out of debt. Tell you about their regrets, so you can learn from them and avoid the same mistakes. They are the wisdom of our society -- take advantage of their existence while they're still around.
25. Learn new skills. Constantly improve yourself instead of standing still -- not because you're so imperfect now, but because it is gratifying and satisfying. You should accept yourself as you are, and learn to love who you are, but still try to improve -- if only because the process of improvement is life itself.
26. Find spirituality. For some, this means finding God or Jesus or Allah or Buddha. For others, this means becoming in tune with the spirits of our ancestors, or with nature. For still others, this just means an inner energy. Whatever spirituality means for you, rediscover it, and its power.
27. Take mini-retirements. Don't leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you're young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up, sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.
28. Do nothing. Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.
29. Stop playing video games. They might be fun, but they can take up way too much time. If you spend a lot of time playing online games, or computer solitaire, or Wii or Gameboy or whatever, consider going a week without it. Then find something else to do, outside.
30. Watch sunsets, daily. One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so.
31. Stop reading magazines. They're basically crap. And they waste your time and money. Cancel your subscriptions and walk past them at the news stands. If you have to read something, read a trashy novel or even better, read Dumb Little Man once a day and be done.
32. Break out from ruts. Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.
33. Stop watching the news. It's depressing and useless. If you're a news junky, this may be difficult. I haven't watch TV news or read a newspaper regularly in about two years. It hasn't hurt me a bit. Anything important, my mom tells me about.
34. Laugh till you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.
35. Lose control. Not only control over yourself, but control over others. It's a bad habit to try to control others -- it will only lead to stress and unhappiness for yourself and those you try to control. Let others live, and live for yourself. And lose control of yourself now and then too.
36. Cry. Men, especially, tend to hold in our tears, but crying is an amazing release. Cry at sad movies. Cry at a funeral. Cry when you are hurt, or when somebody you love is hurt. It releases these emotions and allows us to cleanse ourselves.
37. Make an awesome dessert. I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn't an every day thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it's wonderful.
38. Try something new, every week. Ask yourself: "What new thing shall I try this week?" Then be sure to do it. You don't have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life.
39. Be in the moment. Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.
- Leo Babauta
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Every Day Is Recess
By Robert A. Schuller
"Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall." – 2 Peter 1:10
When kids burst out the doors at a typical grammar school and head for the playground at recess, what do they do? Whatever they want . . . as long as they stay within the bounds of the playground and play according to school rules. Without telling them what to do, some run for the swings, some for the jungle gym, some for the slide, and some for the merry-go-round. Others jump rope, play jacks on the sidewalk, or throw a Frisbee. Still others race for the ball fields to play softball or kickball. Some shoot hoops. Why do they make the choices they do? Because it's what brings them joy at recess and they know they're free to choose how to spend their precious thirty minutes of freedom. Okay, peer pressure and friendships may steer some of the kids one direction or the other, but let's assume they are fulfilling their longings by the activity they choose at recess. I believe this is the way God wants us to think of life. School children have a designated area in which to play and general guidelines of courtesy and safety to follow. Within these two limitations they can do whatever they want. Our playground is planet Earth and our guidelines are God's moral stipulations that are for our own good. Within these boundaries, we are free to do whatever we want! That doesn't negate the idea of God's purpose or calling for our lives. Just as a teacher might come alongside and influence a student to adjust his or her activity, God is perfectly capable of working within our choices to cause us to fulfill the purpose He knows will suit us best. Our challenge is to look at life as our playground and every day as recess – to take off the blinders and dream bigger and farther than we've ever dreamed before.
God loves to creatively work within our "fun" to accomplish His purposes.
When kids burst out the doors at a typical grammar school and head for the playground at recess, what do they do? Whatever they want . . . as long as they stay within the bounds of the playground and play according to school rules. Without telling them what to do, some run for the swings, some for the jungle gym, some for the slide, and some for the merry-go-round. Others jump rope, play jacks on the sidewalk, or throw a Frisbee. Still others race for the ball fields to play softball or kickball. Some shoot hoops. Why do they make the choices they do? Because it's what brings them joy at recess and they know they're free to choose how to spend their precious thirty minutes of freedom. Okay, peer pressure and friendships may steer some of the kids one direction or the other, but let's assume they are fulfilling their longings by the activity they choose at recess. I believe this is the way God wants us to think of life. School children have a designated area in which to play and general guidelines of courtesy and safety to follow. Within these two limitations they can do whatever they want. Our playground is planet Earth and our guidelines are God's moral stipulations that are for our own good. Within these boundaries, we are free to do whatever we want! That doesn't negate the idea of God's purpose or calling for our lives. Just as a teacher might come alongside and influence a student to adjust his or her activity, God is perfectly capable of working within our choices to cause us to fulfill the purpose He knows will suit us best. Our challenge is to look at life as our playground and every day as recess – to take off the blinders and dream bigger and farther than we've ever dreamed before.
God loves to creatively work within our "fun" to accomplish His purposes.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
A Master Fisher of Men
Mr. J. Bosinger of Conoor who died in 1906, 85 years of age, and who came to India in 1847, as the first Industrial Brother of the Basel Mission, having spent more than sixty years in India without a furlough, told me much about Mr. Hebich whom he knew intimately for more than a decade, having sometimes accompanied him on his mission tours. In answer to my question concerning the stability of Hebich's converts he replied:
“The majority of them proved themselves true Christians, many of them having also become great soul-winners. Mr. Hebich knew how to sound the deepest depths of men's hearts. He would give no peace nor rest, until they had made a full surrender to Jesus.
“His method with men often seemed harsh, but then he would say, 'I must first kill them with the hammer of the law, before I can comfort them with the Gospel.' Let me relate to you an instance of his way of dealing with men:
“One day we were out taking a walk, and we came to an engineer's bungalow. 'Come,' said Mr. Hebich, 'let us call and see this man.' I reluctantly entered the house of the gentleman, for I was a stranger to him. As soon as Mr. Hebich saw him, he said, ‘I have called to tell you that you ought to be ashamed of yourself, for disgracing your God and your country by your sinful life.’
“The gentleman replied, 'That is none of your business!'
“Mr. Hebich then shouted in a loud, almost angry voice, so great was his zeal: 'That is my business. As a faithful minister of Jesus Christ, I must denounce all sin and unrighteousness. I have now called to demand of you, in the name of our Righteous Judge, that you repent of your sins.'
“This denunciation made the engineer very angry. ‘Leave my house, Mr. Hebich!’ he shouted, ‘I did not ask you to call, and will not listen to your violent tirades in my own house!’
“‘No, never,’ the old man replied, ‘I will not leave you, until you confess your sins and beg God's pardon on your knees for leading such a disgraceful life. You are a bad man, and ought to be ashamed of yourself. Get down on your knees and confess, or you will go to hell, to the devils whom you serve. I will not leave you, until you hear my message!'’
“Then the man jumped up in a rage and said sarcastically: 'If you don't leave, then I will!' Ordering his boy to have his horse saddled, he left us without another word, and soon we saw him riding away at a furious gallop. Then we left the house.
“I felt annoyed at Mr. Hebich’s abruptness and remarked to him: ‘Now you have spoilt all by your hard words. It is not necessary to break down the door, if you would enter a house.’
The old man only smiled and said, ‘I have fastened a hook in him that he will not get away from.’
“He was right. Before he called to see such men, he would always spend much time in prayer for them. Only when he had the assurance of victory in prayer, the witness of the Spirit, would he call to see them, but then he came as a victor.
“Three days after this stormy visit to the engineer’s bungalow, the gentleman wrote Mr. Hebich a chit: ‘Dear Mr. Hebich, for God’s sake come to see me at once! I have not slept a wink since you were here. I am all undone. I can find no peace nor rest. My conscience condemns me. I am in hell. What must I do to be saved?’
“Then Mr. Hebich brought Jesus to the man and the man to Jesus. Soon the engineer saw Jesus on the cross, and could believe that the bleeding Saviour had with His own precious blood also washed his sins away.
“This engineer, in after years, proved by his pure, consistent, humble life that he had truly repented of his sins, and that he had become indeed a true disciple of Jesus.”
Mr. J. Bosinger of Conoor who died in 1906, 85 years of age, and who came to India in 1847, as the first Industrial Brother of the Basel Mission, having spent more than sixty years in India without a furlough, told me much about Mr. Hebich whom he knew intimately for more than a decade, having sometimes accompanied him on his mission tours. In answer to my question concerning the stability of Hebich's converts he replied:
“The majority of them proved themselves true Christians, many of them having also become great soul-winners. Mr. Hebich knew how to sound the deepest depths of men's hearts. He would give no peace nor rest, until they had made a full surrender to Jesus.
“His method with men often seemed harsh, but then he would say, 'I must first kill them with the hammer of the law, before I can comfort them with the Gospel.' Let me relate to you an instance of his way of dealing with men:
“One day we were out taking a walk, and we came to an engineer's bungalow. 'Come,' said Mr. Hebich, 'let us call and see this man.' I reluctantly entered the house of the gentleman, for I was a stranger to him. As soon as Mr. Hebich saw him, he said, ‘I have called to tell you that you ought to be ashamed of yourself, for disgracing your God and your country by your sinful life.’
“The gentleman replied, 'That is none of your business!'
“Mr. Hebich then shouted in a loud, almost angry voice, so great was his zeal: 'That is my business. As a faithful minister of Jesus Christ, I must denounce all sin and unrighteousness. I have now called to demand of you, in the name of our Righteous Judge, that you repent of your sins.'
“This denunciation made the engineer very angry. ‘Leave my house, Mr. Hebich!’ he shouted, ‘I did not ask you to call, and will not listen to your violent tirades in my own house!’
“‘No, never,’ the old man replied, ‘I will not leave you, until you confess your sins and beg God's pardon on your knees for leading such a disgraceful life. You are a bad man, and ought to be ashamed of yourself. Get down on your knees and confess, or you will go to hell, to the devils whom you serve. I will not leave you, until you hear my message!'’
“Then the man jumped up in a rage and said sarcastically: 'If you don't leave, then I will!' Ordering his boy to have his horse saddled, he left us without another word, and soon we saw him riding away at a furious gallop. Then we left the house.
“I felt annoyed at Mr. Hebich’s abruptness and remarked to him: ‘Now you have spoilt all by your hard words. It is not necessary to break down the door, if you would enter a house.’
The old man only smiled and said, ‘I have fastened a hook in him that he will not get away from.’
“He was right. Before he called to see such men, he would always spend much time in prayer for them. Only when he had the assurance of victory in prayer, the witness of the Spirit, would he call to see them, but then he came as a victor.
“Three days after this stormy visit to the engineer’s bungalow, the gentleman wrote Mr. Hebich a chit: ‘Dear Mr. Hebich, for God’s sake come to see me at once! I have not slept a wink since you were here. I am all undone. I can find no peace nor rest. My conscience condemns me. I am in hell. What must I do to be saved?’
“Then Mr. Hebich brought Jesus to the man and the man to Jesus. Soon the engineer saw Jesus on the cross, and could believe that the bleeding Saviour had with His own precious blood also washed his sins away.
“This engineer, in after years, proved by his pure, consistent, humble life that he had truly repented of his sins, and that he had become indeed a true disciple of Jesus.”
Monday, May 5, 2008
The Problem in The Post Office
I was received into the membership of the Christian Church by the Rev. Arthur Harries, and it was he, my first pastor, who told this story to his congregation.
The post office officials were much interested as they read the words on an envelope which had just arrived from Japan . “To the man of God, -- Monmouthshire, England .”
"Who can that be?" asked the sorting official; but his colleagues were unable to answer his question. Then one man exclaimed, "Well, it's not the parson, anyhow," and instantly they all agreed. The local clergyman did not fit the description. One by one, the names of the other ministers were mentioned; but in spite of the fact that several of these men were nice fellows and exceedingly popular, they did not fit the description on the envelope.
The problem of delivering the letter was becoming acute, when rather abruptly a member of the staff said, "I know. Yes, I know who he is. He's old Mr. - . If any man in this town has earned the right to that title, he is the man." The listeners agreed, and one was deputed to take the letter to the man's house.
The old Christian marvelled that the post office staff should think him worthy of such a compliment; but when he opened the letter, he discovered that their choice had been sound. The letter had been written to him by a Japanese student whom he had entertained months earlier.
The young man had been studying in Wales , and had been received into the home of his new friend. When he returned to Japan , he desired to send a letter of appreciation; but alas, he had lost the address of his former host. However, that presented no problem for he had gained the impression that he had stayed with a man of God. He smiled and was reassured, for in his own country, a man of God was known near and far.
Surely this would be the case in other lands. Everybody would know the man of God, and if he addressed the letter in that fashion, it would reach its destination. It did; and in so doing, paid tribute to one whose consecrated service had charmed a Community. One wonders what would happen if such a letter were addressed to the man of God - in my town. Would the postal officials think of me?
Paul wrote in Philippians 1: 20, 21, “…that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life or by death. For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” Paul's reference to the magnifying glass is most interesting, and its connection with "the man of God" is obvious.
A magnifying glass does not actually increase the size of anything: it only seems to do this. Actually the object at which a man may be looking is exactly the same size, but the glass brings it into bold relief, and the watcher is able to see it more clearly. It is not possible to make Christ more wonderful, for “He is the Altogether Lovely One, and the chiefest among ten thousand.” Yet, if by God's grace we can become magnifying glasses - in perfect alignment with the Master and men - they will be able to see Him more clearly when they look at Him through us. All the details of His superb glory may be brought into delightful relief if we are what we ought to be.
Most probably, St. Paul had a similar thought in mind when he wrote, "Ye are living epistles, seen and read of all men." We read the Scriptures to learn more of Christ. Likewise, people read us in order to achieve identical results.
The fact that the letter addressed to the man of God reached its destination, suggests that the honoured Christian had been a magnifying glass. He had so magnified his Lord that even the people in the post office had been able to see Him.
They had also read his everyday actions, and had recognized in them the presence of the Lord. The old man had been a living epistle of righteousness.
And ever since my old pastor told that story, I have wistfully longed to reach that standard of holiness. It is the Christian’s Mount Everest !
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Unexpected Showers of Tenderness
By Robert H. Schuller
"I love the Lord, for He heard my voice; He heard my cry for mercy." - Psalm 116:1 (TNIV)
At the darkest time in life, and at the weariest moment of our existence, when it appears that God has forsake or forgotten us, when we cannot comprehend or see evidence of the goodness of God, He will come and bestow mercy and tenderness.
If, in your time of tragedy, you will cling with a childlike faith to God, He will visit you with a tender kiss of mercy.
I remember a day when I endured a weird assortment of irritations, conflicts, and tensions. I finally arrived home at five-thirty, went to my bedroom, tried in vain to relax, and prayed without any apparent relief.
Then suddenly God answered my prayer in a most remarkable way. My bedroom door opened. Slowly, cautiously, my little girl peeked through the opening of the doorway. Her big brown eyes appeared through the slot in the door and, judging that it was safe, she suddenly threw the door wide open, ran to the edge of the bed, and the next thing I knew her soft silky hair was flowing over my eyelids and caressing my lips.
Her soft cheek was on mine. She kissed and hugged me, then drew swiftly back as if she was expecting me to say, "What do you want?" And she said, "I just wanted to kiss you, because I love you, Daddy."
And abruptly she whirled out, skipping and running, and the door closed behind her. She was gone, but I found myself relaxed. I drew strength from this unexpected invasion of affection.
So God comes to us at the trying times in life with an unexpected shower of tenderness.
An unexpected shower of tenderness can soften even the hardest heart.
* * *
My Father, thank You for hearing the silent sobs of my heart, and for knowing the unexpressed needs of my life that leave me very much in need of Your tender and loving touch. Your goodness surrounds me. I love you, Lord.
An unexpected shower of tenderness can soften even the hardest heart.
* * *
My Father, thank You for hearing the silent sobs of my heart, and for knowing the unexpressed needs of my life that leave me very much in need of Your tender and loving touch. Your goodness surrounds me. I love you, Lord.
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